the ones that seek and find.

August 14, 2010

A few words just can’t seem to get out of my head now.

Well, not a few, but quite a bit actually.

“When I look at you, I don’t just see one person. I see the men behind you. And every one of those men has someone waiting for them to come home. Ultimately I am not responsible to you, not to this school, but to those at home waiting for their sons, brothers or boyfriends to come home. My results are not measured by your success in this course today, but by the success of your actions in your units tomorrow.”

These words were said by someone of great stature, and I believe this will stay with me for a long, long time.

But why it keeps running through my head, I don’t know. It’s been a while since I’ve had some quiet-time with myself, but I actually had a moment to do just that today. Perhaps it’s the environment I’m in now; the lecturers, the peers, the place, the programme; everything has allowed me to take a long-overdue step backward, and look at what I’ve done so far.

Reading and listening to others as they recount their experiences, I reflected on my own experience so far in the Force. For a lack of a better word, I compared. And that might not have been the best thing to do, since no two experiences are hardly ever the same. But I did, and inevitably, I feel a sense of regret, the nagging feeling that says ‘Damn why didn’t I do that’ and ‘Shit I wish I had known this sooner’.

I look back at when I first started considering to sign on, and I recounted my motivations. I wanted to be an Instructor in OCS, to train, motivate and inspire cadets so that they may eventually do the same when they are commissioned as officers. I was excited.

But now, after being inspired and motivated by the people I’ve met so far, I ask myself if I have done the same for my boys back in unit. Or rather, have I done enough?

There are now so many things that I have in my mind, and I have truly been rejuvenated here in the Spiritual Home of the Officers Corp. What was excitement when I first signed on, when I got my posting letter, is now peppered with a little bit of regret, that I’d be leaving the place that has played a part in shaping me, the place that contains the people whom I deeply care for, the place that I have grown to love.

As the date draws nearer, I just hope that the time I’ve spent in 3GDS has been as meaningful for the people I’ve worked with, as it has been for me.

3GDS will always be the place that I look at whenever I drive past it on the ECP; the place that I look out for as the plane is on approach to land at Changi; the place that will always be the Home of the Elite.

Always Ready, Ready to Strike.


3 Responses to “the ones that seek and find.”

  1. Wei said


  2. Denise said

    Oh my god.

    -squeezes Sammy’s paws in disbelief-

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